:: Pedantic Platitudes ::

Greetings! My name is Sam J and I am a student at Harvard University. Perhaps this blog will present a little look into the mundane yet unique events that make up my life.
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:: Saturday, March 01, 2003 ::

This is war! A blog war!

My friend, who shall remain nameless (::cough:: KATIE ::cough::), from California has been insisting on the following (and ridiculous) criteria:
And I quote (she has been bold enough to even publish this on her blog):

"here is the true definition of what it means to be a SUPER V (well at least the west coast version)
Superior Super V + (has to have the + sign)= Never Been Kissed
Ultra Super V + = Has been kissed but no Sexual relationships
Ultra Super V= Has been kissed and has been touched in certain areas
Super V= Has had Manual or Oral sex but not both
V= has had both Manual and Oral Sex
Half of a V- has pulled out half way during the beginning stages of sex
The non innocent -has had sex."

She has even gone as far to say that this is a "West Coast" version of the rules just because I disagreed with her... Now, being a West Coaster by heart, I completely object to this excuse that the criteria can be different because of the different coasts. Thus, here are my rules, which are obviously correct. Yes... 'tis true... I came up with these on the front steps of a church, so it must be the gospel truth.

Ultra Super V Plus = Pure
Ultra Super V = Kissing
Super V = Manual Sex
V = Oral Sex
Half a V = Coitus Interruptus
Non-V = Corrupted

See why my scale is better? It is obvious that my use of the phrase "coitus interruptus" makes my criteria far superior.

:: SL 10:51 PM [+] ::

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